The integral intention for people to maintain secrets is to defend the peace. We hold onto secrets to keep other people pleased, prudent, set in their vision of the world, and in their vision of us. They have an incredible if paradoxical leverage to unite people and to disconnect them. From administrative conspiracies to mates having affairs and cheatings, secrets saturate every grade of civilization. Secrets have lived throughout eternity, but the essence of secrets has lately shifted in our society.
The secrets we create shape our identities creating a perception of what we expose and shelter. A wise man unfolds his thoughts and ideas very cautiously while creating a personality and stance that he uses to affect the world. A well-protected secret can build boundaries to hide a fact that helps in nurturing positive connections. Revealing the same secret can destroy that delicately balanced game of Zenga.
We live in an era where revealing them however painful is considered rewarding and soothing. But confessing secrets in a mistaken way or at the awry juncture can be awfully painful and disastrous. Secrets are maintained or emptied for many complicated intentions, from self-serving misuses of power to altruistic safety of others. Although we encounter secrets in every area of life, they are perhaps most destructive when kept in the home. Families are support systems for any individual. Someone’s capability to form a constructive relationship with others strives from his ability to trust and communicate. The emotional stress can be too big a burden to bear if family members tend to stop sharing thoughts and events. They can also stiffen the development of an individual at fundamental points in life especially during transitions of marriage, graduations, etc.
Not all secrets are disastrous. For example, a secret kept between two siblings can strengthen their trust. Best friends are solely based on the idea of sharing secrets. They achieve a sense of liberation and an impression of immediacy. But still, it induces an undesirable Triangle where the closeness is at the cost of someone else’s isolation.